First, let’s talk about you. You likely have mixed emotions about your student remaining away from home, and that’s normal. Make sure to incorporate the following tips to help you deal with your emotions regarding your student’s decision to stay away:
Acknowledge Your Feelings
You may be disappointed that your student has decided not to come home for the summer, and it’s okay to feel that way. Even though you want them to spread their wings and gain independence, it is okay for part of you to be upset. Acknowledge these feelings to yourself and you can even share them with your student (without pressuring them to change plans).
Take Time for Yourself
Self-care is not often paired with parenthood. But now is the time to incorporate it into your routine because you can! If you start to see positive associations with your student being away, it will make it much more bearable.
Focus on Positives
There are a lot of positive aspects of your student staying away for the summer. You’ll get to remain on your “empty nester” schedule and won’t have to incorporate a college student’s lifestyle into your routine.
Your student staying away from home also means they will have the opportunity to continue to practice “adulting” and will create much more independence.
Next, let’s talk about how you can help support your student. If your student decides to stay away for the summer, whether it’s remaining on campus or moving somewhere else for an internship, there are ways you can help set them up for success, such as:
Help with Housing & Transportation
They’re going to need a place to stay. They may need your help house/apartment hunting and interviewing potential roommates. In addition, they will need a way to get around town, whether it’s a car, bike, or transit pass. Help set them up with everything they need to successfully navigate town on their own.
Moving Assistance
Even if your student is staying on campus, it may not be in the same location as it was during the previous semester. They will likely need some assistance moving their things to their summer spot and they’ll appreciate all the help they can get!
Nearby Connections
It can be beneficial to connect your student with a family member or trusted friend nearby that they can call if they need anything, from an emergency to local advice.
Office Attire
If your student is staying away for a job or internship opportunity, they may need your help getting proper attire they’ve left at home. Or they may need to get a few new items that are workplace appropriate. You want to ensure they make a great impression at their job or internship because those opportunities often lead to employment offers upon graduation.
Support from Afar
Just because you’re not physically there doesn’t mean you can’t be there for them emotionally. If you’re having trouble with the change of them being away from home, chances are they are as well. Regular check-ins, care packages and support can make them feel more secure while still maintaining their sense of independence.
Plan Visits
They may not be coming home for the summer, but that doesn’t mean they don’t want to see you! Most students welcome (scheduled) visits from their parents and will look forward to them. It can be a treat to have family come to town and sit down for a good meal!
Though your student staying home for the summer may not have been your first choice, it’s important to guide and support their independence. Our tips can help you stay focused on the positive aspects, handle your emotions well and draw attention to how the change can be beneficial for both you and your student. Remember, just because they are not physically with you does not mean you can’t be there for them in a multitude of ways!
